Exactly One Year Ago…

One year ago today, I recommitted to weight watchers.

One year ago today, I weighed 234.6.

One year ago today, my life began to change. Well, change more.

The weight loss journey has been a bumpy one, to say the least… It’s been filled with big losses on the scale, a few gains, better eating habits, slip ups that involved copious amounts of chocolate, more exercise and a 5 month long plateau.

Weight is not gained overnight, so I know I shouldn’t expect it to come off overnight. But I’m a damn impatient person. But I’ve also become lazy in the winter months. And this, along with months if snow lead me into a depressed state. I tracked my food diligently, but even with tracking – it was what I was eating that was causing the issues. Which made me fall into the guilt cycle.

Queue the 5month self-inflicted plateau.

Queue the frustration.

Queue the feeling of wanting to just believe this is as good as it gets.

Queue the desperation of looking at diet pills and quick fixes – knowing full well they do. Not. Work.

Queue the feeling to want to do more.

Queue the feeling to want to feel and live healthier.

Queue the feeling to crush this plateau.

Queue the feeling to become a better role model.

All those feelings in queue makes me want to keep going. To not give the 75% I’ve been giving, but to give 200%. To overcome the laziness and half-assedness that this winter has inflicted upon me.

I stepped on the scale this morning, much like I did a year ago. My bathroom looks the same. Same scale. The only thing that was different – the number on the scale.

It glowed a black number backlit by a brilliant bright blue.

202.

While I’m not entirely happy, I’m not disappointed either. It’s 32lbs lost. 32.6 if you’re counting decimals. It’s the weight of TheSmoosh. I lost a toddler.

I have now set smaller 5pound goals with small rewards in hopes of increasing my motivation. I have about 35lbs to go, roughly. So I’m about halfway there.

I know that this last half will be hard. Harder than the first half. But I’m ready.

Come at me bro.

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